After being so immersed in the world the actor helped create, it can be difficult to get yourself out of that world and come up with comments about good acting. To help you, this article describes how you can praise an actor for a good performance.
Everyone is different, but compliments to give good actors can be compliments about being unrecognizable, blending into the work, impacting you, being accurate and conveying the intended feelings, and being a joy to watch. If you are family or an actor they admire, practically any compliment works.
Specific examples of such compliments that actors (of varying degrees of fame) have said that they really liked are given below. (By the way, if you’re thinking of complimenting a friend or family member who is an actor, you might also be interested in the Gifts for Actors article or the Gifts for Filmmakers article.)
1. Compliments about being unrecognizable
There are many things actors can do to make themselves unrecognizable, even if they don’t make any drastic changes through makeup and costumes. For example, as shown in the video above, actors can adjust their posture, can change the way they speak, can change their mannerisms, and can make choices that are different from the choices they typically make. As stated in Tongayi Chirisa’s quote below, sometimes just seeing the actor in a film with a different genre can make you wonder whether it’s still the same actor.
“The highest compliment somebody can pay to me is when they go, ‘I forgot it was you, I couldn’t recognize you.’ That’s what I like from acting.” – Cillian Murphy (source)
“If somebody says to you, ‘You weren’t at all like yourself,’ that’s the greatest compliment you can pay an actor.” – Judi Dench (source)
“To me, the highest compliment you can pay to an actor is, ‘Man, I didn’t recognize you.’” – Joseph Gordon-Levitt (source)
“It’s a beautiful thing when you have people scratch their head and ask, ‘Is that him? No, that can’t be him. He looks so different.’ That for me is the highest compliment that you could ever give an actor, that when you see them in a different genre, you actually have to think twice.” – Tongayi Chirisa (source)
“My best compliment is when people tell me they had no idea that was me in a film. I transformed into someone unrecognizable as me, which is what an actor is supposed to be able to do, not just memorize words.” – Laz Alonzo (source)
It is interesting to note that the compliments above are not specific. In fact, they are very vague, which sounds honest, because when you are confused about someone being unrecognizable it’s hard to put that into words, and it’s hard to pinpoint what exactly it was that made the person unrecognizable.
By the way, this type of compliment about being unrecognizable could be especially valuable for actors who are famous, because some of them say that their fame interferes with their performances sometimes, because the audience might think of them as the famous actor rather than as the character being portrayed. Michael Caine mentions this issue in the next video.
2. Compliments about blending into the work and being really “in it”
You sometimes hear improv performers saying that awards for improv don’t really make sense, because the best improv performers aren’t those who are funny but those who can make their co-performers look good. Similarly, actors want the focus to be on the story rather than on them because, after all, the whole purpose of the work is to tell story that the writer/director wanted to convey. This is why actors can really value compliments that show that they were successful in seamlessly becoming part of the work, so you don’t really notice the acting. You notice the story.
“The best compliment I ever got from the public or producers or directors is that I just totally blend in and become the character and they don’t notice me and that the play happens or the movie happens or the television show happens.” – J.K. Simmons (source)
“. . . he said he felt that the actor got completely lost and he believed that that character was alive for him in front of him, which as far as I’m concerned, is the highest compliment he could have paid me.” – John Hurt (source)
“The greatest compliment I ever got was John, after we were doing a very intimate scene in his office, turned to me at one point and he says, ‘I don’t even remember who the camera’s on.’ Like acting with each other is so great, literally, he let it evolve, regardless of who’s on camera . . . John and I were always right there for each other and we just wanted to act. The camera? They can just do what they do and they’ll figure it out. We just wanted to act. And that’s the feeling that was pervasive throughout the experience.” – Richard Schiff (source)
“I think that’s one of my favorite compliments is someone said, ‘I didn’t feel like I was watching actors. I felt like I was just sitting inside watching a family.’” – Jake Austin Walker (source)
There are many ways to express this type of compliment. As the examples above show, you plainly tell actors that they blended well into the work, you can tell actors that you forgot about the acting and you just noticed the character, and you can talk about the story that was happening (as in the quote about how someone felt they were just watching a family rather than actors).
It is also interesting to see that, if you are an actor, you can use this compliment with your fellow actors. If your scene partner is a great actor, they help you feel like you’re really in the story, and that helps you become a great actor to because you become so immersed in that world. If you are an actor and your scene partner helps you feel this way, you can let them know that you appreciate it.
3. Compliments about how their work affected you
Someone I know once told me that they wanted to be an actor because they noticed that, many times, the people who inspire us to go into various professions aren’t those professionals, but rather the actors who portrayed them on screen. As an actor, you can be a role model, really affecting people’s lives. Similar to how teachers love it when their students express appreciation towards them, so can actors love it when people say that their performances positively affected them in some way.
“The kindest compliments I have ever heard are when cops tell me Training Day (2001) and Assault on Precinct 13 (2005) inspired them to become cops.” – Ethan Hawke (source)
“I did a musical once (with Quoran William Salyers) about a real (and remarkable, and complicated) person named John Broadus Watson. Several of his descendants came to see it, and told us afterward that we’d helped them understand and forgive him for the things he’d done that plagued their family. I’ll never forget it.” – Rebecca Metz (source)
“A theatre reviewer from one of the Asian community newspapers said that she saw her own grandmother in me as I was on stage. That remains the highest compliment I have ever received about my work as an actor.” – Aya Hashiguchi Clark (source)
[on the best compliment she ever got] “An elderly lady came up to me in a restaurant to say that she rarely watches Hindi films but loved my performance in Dor.” – Ayesha Takia (source)
“There is nothing that makes me happier than when someone says, ‘I watched your movie The Mask 300 times when I was kid.’ I look forward to the time when I am 70 or 80 years old and people come up to me going ‘It was you, dude’. That’s an amazing feeling.” – Jim Carrey (source)
There are many ways in which a performance can affect people, so this is one of those compliments where you can include unique details. As the examples above show, you can talk about how their performances affected some of your life decisions, how they made you see things in a new way, how they made you feel something nice or useful, how they enriched your life by introducing something new into it, and simply how they significantly touched your life. It can be nice knowing that what you can do on screen can reach out beyond the screen and touch people’s lives.
4. Compliments about how realistic it was
Actors can put a lot of work into doing research for their roles, especially if they’re playing someone who is very different from them due to things like skills, life experiences, appearance, actions, and perceptions. After putting so much effort into making the character or situation as realistic as possible, it can be nice to get at least some recognition and compliments about how all that work led to good (realistic) results.
For example, one of the actors quoted below is Aaron Paul (who played Jesse Pinkman on Breaking Bad). He made experience-related sacrifices in order to help him understand his character better, such as hanging out in dark alleys while also wearing his costume from the show, and ultimately he even had dreams as his character. (You can see him describing what he went through in this interview.) After you’ve gone through so much, it can be nice to know that it was, after all, worthwhile, and that people who are actually real experts in that area see you as having portrayed that world accurately.
“The best compliment I ever had was from Irene Fornes. When she saw me in ‘Lull’ [the 1964 Murray Schisgal comedy in which he played the disheveled, disreputable Harry Berlin], for 20 minutes she thought they had let some real bum on stage.” – Alan Arkin (source)
“A lot of recovering addicts have come up to me. It’s so crazy. They instantly feel connected to me, or really to the character. An example: these two guys from New York, who were addicts for sixteen years, were childhood friends who started using at the same time. They had this chemical romance. And they gave me this big hug and said, ‘This just reminds us of why we’re clean. We applaud you for doing the character justice.’ That’s the biggest compliment ever. All I want to do is be true and honest to that world.” – Aaron Paul (source)
“The highest compliment a performer can receive is when someone stops you and says, ‘You were so real.’ That’s what I’m after now. I want to hear those words a lot.” – Kim Basinger (source)
“Al Pacino gave me a great compliment when he saw Nebraska. I’d never met him, but he said to me, ‘How did you do that?’ and I said, ‘What do you mean?’ He said, ‘I never saw the work.’ And that was the greatest compliment I ever had. For him to say he didn’t see any acting going on, he just saw the character.” – Bruce Dern (source)
That last quote by Bruce Dern shows another way in which actors can be realistic/accurate. This way is more subtle, and it is related to reacting genuinely within scenes to make the audience feel that this is a real person reacting to real events. Therefore, this compliment can also be related to the previous compliment about blending well into the work.
5. Compliments about successfully conveying the intended feelings
Actors act to convey feelings. The audience isn’t supposed to always know why they feel a certain way – they just have to feel it. Therefore, when you’re complimenting an actor, you don’t exactly have to tell them what they did well when they were performing – it can be a good compliment just to reveal how they made you feel. Then the actor can feel good when they see that the way you feel is what they were trying so hard to make you feel.
“I don’t want to divulge too much to the people who haven’t seen the movie, but the moment towards the end where my character gets what’s coming to him, the entire audience erupted in applause at our first screening at SXSW. To me, that was the greatest compliment I ever received as an actor.” – Anson Mount (source)
“I remember doing a run of Alice in Wonderland for all the elementary schools. I played The Red Queen and The Mad Hatter, and at the end of the play a few of the kids would run up and kick me. I remember thinking ‘Awe, that’s the sweetest compliment ever.’ Because those kids believed me so much.” – Elizabeth Weinstein (source)
“One of the nicest compliments I would get very often on the street is people would say, ‘I love you on The Good Wife (2009). I just can’t tell whether I should like you or hate you!’.” – Nathan Lane (source)
You can probably see from the compliments above that all of them are about successfully conveying negative feelings. Perhaps this trend is caused by the fact there is more of a contrast between those negative feelings and the joy or excitement that one might feel when they meet an actor. That contrast helps the actor see that their performance was so powerful that the resulting feelings managed to break through into the real world and get in the way of social conventions. It is a compliment about being persuasive.
(In contrast, if someone plays a superhero who you always cheer for and you continue cheering for them in real life as if they were still that superhero, that can be hard to distinguish from people cheering due to politeness and peer pressure.)
6. If you’re family, practically any compliment works
From whom do people seek approval? Where do people want to feel a sense of belonging? Many times, the answer is family. Therefore, practically any compliment that shows approval can be welcome if you are a family member or someone who is very close.
“The compliment that I like more than anything is when my family tells me I’m the same Ryan. I never want to become a celeb who forgets about anybody or has a big head about himself.” – Ryan Guzman (source)
“My parents never comment on my work. After watching Amma Cheppindi, my father said that I could also act. I treat it as my best compliment.” – Sharwanand (source)
“One day my 3-year-old daughter said: ‘You’re very handsome, Poppy.’ That was the best compliment ever.” – Patrick Dempsey (source)
“My mother was a housewife, she played bridge all day. But she could have run the joint chiefs of staff. She was a really extraordinary person, and she never had the chance . . . she said, ‘Meryl, you are capable.’ That’s the highest compliment in the world.” – Meryl Streep (source)
“The first compliment that I got, it was from my wife, she is my partner, my guru, she taught me the basic of acting and she told me that I was looking fantastic and she is excited to see what I did. She watched the film and was crying and hugged me saying she is proud of me. I think that was it. That for me was the biggest compliment.” – Sharad Kelkar (source)
As you can see from the compliments above, sometimes the compliments are related to acting, and sometimes they’re not. Just knowing that someone you want to be loved by does indeed see you in a positive light is a very nice feeling.
7. If you’re an actor they admire, practically any compliment works
From whom might actors specifically also want approval? With whom also might actors specifically want to feel a connection? The answer could be actors they see as role models. As you can see in the video above, even Robert de Niro’s seemingly minor compliment of, “That’s a good question,” was enough to light up and inspire Bradley Cooper for a lot of time to come. You see that someone you admire has noticed you. And not only that – they have commented on you. And not only that – the comment was a compliment!
“The greatest compliment I ever received came while I was working with Sir Laurence Olivier. Lord Olivier. We were making a film called Sleuth, and I did a scene with him. When it finished, he looked at me and said, “I thought I had an assistant. I see I have a partner.” – Michael Caine (source)
[On filming Tales from the Crypt episode “Yellow” with Kirk Douglas] “I had to tell Kirk Douglas that his son was a yellow bastard . . . He called me over and he goes, ‘Lance . . . Such power . . . such power.’ To get that kind of compliment from him, of all people, was overwhelming. I couldn’t even answer.” – Lance Henriksen (source)
“For me, the best compliment was when Mr (Amitabh) Bachchan said, ‘You were our favourite.’ That moment made it for me- in fact, the reason that I wanted to be in films was Mr Bachchan.” – Divya Dutta (source)
[Regarding Anthony Hopkins’ comment that Brad Pitt is “a character actor in a matinee idol’s body”] “. . . it was the greatest compliment I ever received.” – Brad Pitt (source)
As you can see from the quotes above, some of the compliments were very vague and, nevertheless, they were very much appreciated.
8. Compliments about being a joy to watch
Nice perfumes are those that are a pleasure to smell. Nice music is that which is a pleasure to hear. What about actors? Well, we look at them and listen to them, so nice actors are those who are a pleasure to look at and listen to. It’s such a general compliment but, as you can see from the quotes below, you can express it in a variety of ways, such as using words like “likeable” or simply “delight”.
“. . . the greatest compliment I ever got from anyone wasn’t that I was pretty or that I was whatever, it was that I was likable. I think that’s a really awesome compliment because, as an actor, if you’re likable, then people are always rooting for you even if you’re doing stuff that’s pretty messed up. Which also means that you are relatable. Which also means that you’re human. Those qualities in an actor and in a character are paramount because if you don’t care about a character, goodbye character. They don’t need you. But if someone likes you . . . you’ve got to stay because you want to know what’s going to happen to that character.” – Cassidy Freeman (source)
“The highest compliment that I could receive from a friend is when a friend tells me, ‘Hey, Kether. If you were not on the show, I would still watch this.’ For me, that’s the test. Because, obviously I have very supportive friends. For years and years and years they’ve tuned in to projects that I’m on to support me. And what’s really nice is that my friends, they’re not just tuning in to support me, they’re genuinely tuning in because they like the show. And it’s really cool. It’s like I said, the highest compliment that I could receive from a friend.” – Kether Donohue (source)
“Well, I’m an actor, and once I received a review in a newspaper that simply said ‘Canavan is delight.’ That compliment is hard to top!” – Katie Canavan (source)
The quote above by Kether Donohue also highlights another important thing to note about compliments, especially from friends: we enjoy compliments when we feel that they are genuine.
9. Other compliments (everyone is different)
We like compliments about things we’ve worked hard to accomplish, compliments we get rarely, compliments that remind us of people we admire, and there are many more possible types of compliments that people can like, because we are all different. Furthermore, the compliments we want to receive can change over time. Here are some more examples of compliments that actors have liked:
“I played a bored colonial housewife in this Off Broadway show [Cloud 9] once, and one day on the street, waiting for the light to change, this well-dressed man came up and said, ‘When you first walked out on stage I thought, ”Why would someone hire such an ugly woman?” But you grew on me.’ And that was one of my favorite compliments I’d ever gotten.” – Michael Jeter (source)
“One of the biggest compliments I’ve gotten in recent years was from a guy who told me I should do a Quentin Tarantino movie. He said I’d be a natural for that.” – Kathy Coleman (source)
“My favorite compliment is when I’m complimented on the versatility of my acting.” – Shehroz Subzwari (source)
“I think the best compliment anyone ever gave me was a guy that told me what he liked about me was that I was never satisfied with mediocre in my theatre performances, that I would push and push myself until I not only could deliver what I thought would be good, but what i thought the audience would enjoy. :)” – Abi (source)
As a final note, here is an extra tip for finding compliments that people might appreciate: find out what that person admires in people. They might appreciate compliments about that same thing.
